We’ve all
been there with the post first date blues. You’ve gone on a date with someone
whose company you really enjoyed and for a brucey bonus you also find them
physically attractive. You get home, you text them to let them know you got
home safely and to see if they did as well, and you think fuck it I will throw
in I had a good time as well, you get a benevolent reply back and you find
yourself imagining how good it would be to be their partner, the couple
holidays your going to go on sun bathing by the pool hand in hand, your wedding
your kid’s names, where in which you then softly fall asleep with optimism in
the air.
You awake
with a newfound energy, and a MGM musical spring in your step. Your commute to
work doesn't seem so drag as you re-read the text from last night with optimism
still filling the air. Then BANG!!!! Reality hits you:
‘I told them I was attracted to them telling
them I would like to see them again, but they didn't say they was attracted to
me back. Are they just being diplomatic?’
You start
nitpicking and the paranoia kicks in
‘If they were attracted to me surely they would
have said it back?’
You re-read
the text again and now it reads like a standard auto reply for a polite fuck
off. The post date text that actual means:
‘You’re a nice person sane and not weird, I
don’t find you attractive, I had a nice time in the sense of, the time I
allotted myself before making my getaway wasn't that painful. Please don’t text
me as that way I don’t have to make up shitty excuses to get out of dates with
you bye’
Your smile
turns to a frown; your MGM musical spring has turned into a limp walk you’re
crushed. You then start to think you reading too much into it, that you’re just
being weird and paranoid, you tell yourself to chill the fuck out. Then the eternal battle that men and women
have been fighting since the birth of the SMS, do I text them again or do I wait
for them to text me?
It’s
horrible the waiting its simply horrible. Waiting for that reply text after
you’ve bitten the bullet and asked for another date or you’ve told them your
undying love and now you’re waiting patiently with anguish like it's your
GCSE’S, A-levels, degree and Gum clinic results all rolled into one.
Sometimes
you get a reply back, other times you get total air-pie nothing at all. I don’t
know what sex does it more brutal women or men? Women will argue men are total
wankers for this, but ladies you’re just as brutal, but we blokes are guilty
for the ‘Out of the Blue Horny Text.’ Which is a guy will take a girl out on a
first date. The date will go well, really well the girl will text, won’t get a
reply back, she will text again due to the fact both parties had such a good
time ‘why would he ignore me?’ she will then get the shittest excuse ever for
why he can’t see her again and then 5 months later without no contact the guy
will send a message out of the blue with something along the lines of ‘Do you fancy a fuck?’
To conclude
women and men, don’t be that wanker and put someone through the texting blues.
Just be straight up and honest about if you’re on it or not. To be fair you get
called a wanker for being honest (no matter how polite you’re about it)
anyways, but its better to be honest and get an earful of abuse than giving
someone radio silence leaving them thinking
‘what did they do wrong?’ Better to be a wanker for doing the right
thing.
